Kerry is Back (Knock on Wood)

This Thursday has been long awaited for Kerry Wood owners out there and offers an escape from 8th place. The "once Kerry Wood gets back..." excuse and justification for a struggling pitching staff will not be needed anymore - or will it? Here's my prediction of the Kerry Wood season:

May 18 - Kerry throws 93 pitches. Strikes out 6 in 5 innings and gives up 3 runs. The most important thing he says he's fine.

May 20 - The side session goes great. Suddenly Dusty Baker's job is safe.

May 24 - He gets to 100 pitches for the first time in a quality start. The Chicago Tribune announces that Mark Prior is 2 weeks away from returning to the Cub rotation.

May 26 - The Cubs have won 4 in a row and suddenly fans who doubted that the Cubs could end their World Series drought like their friends on the South side are gaining hope.

May 29 - Derek Lee begins to hit off of a tee. He sees there is still pain but "With Kerry coming back and Mark on the way, I'm too inspired for pain to stop me." Kerry pitches a second straight quality start.

May 30 - Mark Prior stubs his toe outside his pool, his rehab start is pushed back.

June 6 - Derek Lee begins his rehab assignment.

June 8 - After feeling shoulder discomfort from a season high 112 pitches, Wood is put on the DL.

June 9 - Headline of the Chicago Tribune "Shoulda 'Wooda' Coulda Taken Kerry Out Sooner". Derek Lee taken out of rehab start after sliding head first into third base.

June 10 - Dusty is fired. He leaves the office that day with all of his things and said "I didn't do the job."

June 11 - Dusty's son leaves the office.

June 28 - Mark Prior throws off a mound. Then stops throwing because his elbow is causing him too much pain.

July 6 - Derek Lee is estimated back from DL in late August.

July 30 - Kerry Wood makes return to Wrigley, this time as a reliever. He strikeouts 2 in an inning.

August 6 - Kerry Wood discovers he can't pitch on such short rest. He's out for the year.

August 7 - Prior is out for the year. Chicago Tribune says "Value of Cubs Pitching Staff 'Marked' Down"

August 24 - DLee returns, Cub fans are blacked out for the return.

Word of advice: Don't expect Wood to turn around your rotation. Don't trade for him unless he comes cheap.